第60章
- The Price She Paid
- Frank Lee Benedict
- 991字
- 2016-03-02 16:32:27
``Why, you've just told me that you haven't given Stanley anything at all for his money--that you've cheated him outright.The thing itself is discreditable, but your tone suggests that you think I'll admire you for it.''
``Do you mean to say that you'd think more highly of me if I were--what most women would be in the same circumstances?''
``I mean to say that I think the whole business is discreditable to both of you--to his intelligence, to your character.''
``You are frank,'' said she, trying to hide her anger.
``I am frank,'' replied he, undisturbed.He looked at her.``Why should I not be?''
``You know that I need you, that I don't dare resent,'' said she.``So isn't it--a little cowardly?''
``Why do you need me? Not for money, for you know you'll not get that.''
``I don't want it,'' cried she, agitated.``I never thought of it.''
``Yes, you've probably thought of it,'' replied he coolly.``But you will not get it.''
``Well, that's settled--I'll not get it.''
``Then why do you need me? Of what use can I be to you? Only one use in the world.To tell you the truth--the exact truth.Is not that so?''
``Yes,'' she said.``That is what I want from you --what I can't get from anyone else.No one else knows the truth--not even Mrs.Brindley, though she's intelligent.I take back what I said about your being cowardly.Oh, you do stab my vanity so! You mustn't mind my crying out.I can't help it--at least, not till I get used to you.''
``Cry out,'' said he.``It does no harm.''
``How wonderfully you understand me!'' exclaimed she.``That's why I let you say to me anything you please.''
He was smiling peculiarly--a smile that somehow made her feel uncomfortable.She nerved herself for some still deeper stab into her vanity.He said, his gaze upon her and ironical:
``I'm sorry I can't return the compliment.''
``What compliment?'' asked she.
``Can't say that you understand me.Why do you think I am doing this?''
She colored.``Oh, no indeed, Mr.Keith,'' she protested, ``I don't think you are in love with me--or anything of that sort.Indeed, I do not.I know you better than that.''
``Really?'' said he, amused.``Then you are not human.''
``How can you think me so vain?'' she protested.
``Because you are so,'' replied he.``You are as vain--no more so, but just as much so--as the average pretty and attractive woman brought up as you have been.You are not obsessed by the notion that your physical charms are all-powerful, and in that fact there is hope for you.But you attach entirely too much importance to them.You will find them a hindrance for a long time before they begin to be a help to you in your career.And they will always be a temptation to you to take the easy, stupid way of making a living--the only way open to most women that is not positively repulsive.''
``I think it is the most repulsive,'' said Mildred.
``Don't cant,'' replied he, unimpressed.``It's not so repulsive to your sort of woman as manual labor--or as any kind of work that means no leisure, no luxury and small pay.''
``I wonder,'' said Mildred.``I--I'm afraid you're right.But I WON'T admit it.I don't dare.''
``That's the finest, truest thing I've ever heard you say,'' said Keith.
Mildred was pleased out of all proportion to the compliment.Said she with frank eagerness, ``Then I'm not altogether hopeless?''
``As a character, no indeed,'' replied he.``But as a career-- I was about to say, you may set your mind at rest.I shall never try to collect for my services.
I am doing all this solely out of obstinacy.''
``Obstinacy?'' asked the puzzled girl.
``The impossible attracts me.That's why I've never been interested to make a career in law or politics or those things.I care only for the thing that can't be done.When I saw you and studied you, as I study every new thing, I decided that you could not possibly make a career.''
``Why have you changed your mind?'' she interrupted eagerly.
``I haven't,'' replied he.``If I had, I should have lost interest in you.Just as soon as you show signs of making a career, I shall lose interest in you.I have a friend, a doctor, who will take only cases where cure is impossible.Looking at you, it occurred to me that here was a chance to make an experiment more interesting than any of his.And as I have no other impossible task inviting me at present, I decided to undertake you--if you were willing.''
``Why do you tell me this?'' she asked.``To discourage me?''
``No.Your vanity will prevent that.''
``Then why?''
``To clear myself of all responsibility for you.You understand--I bind myself to nothing.I am free to stop or to go on at any time.''
``And I?'' said Mildred.
``You must do exactly as I tell you.''
``But that is not fair,'' cried she.
``Why not?'' inquired he.``Without me you have no hope--none whatever.''
``I don't believe that,'' declared she.``It is not true.''
``Very well.Then we'll drop the business,'' said he tranquilly.``If the time comes when you see that I'm your only hope, and if then I'm in my present humor, we will go on.''
And he lapsed into silence from which she soon gave over trying to rouse him.She thought of what he had said, studied him, but could make nothing of it.She let four days go by, days of increasing unrest and unhappiness.She could not account for herself.Donald Keith seemed to have cast a spell over her--an evil spell.Her throat gave her more and more trouble.She tried her voice, found that it had vanished.